One of our roles as a Facilitator is to give feedback to our team - an assessment, from our strategic vantage point, on how the Meeting/Project is going.

Feedback happens on multiple levels ...

• How is the Team doing?
• How is the Project going?
• How is Each Person on the Team performing in their individual role?
• How are Leadership and Stakeholders supporting the Team and Project?

Since Feedback is one of the most important ways we can measure our performance…

1. Feedback is often delivered as Criticism

Criticism is usually …

• Focused on the problem rather than the solution
• Destructive rather than “Constructive” – even when it's called “constructive”
• Focused on the past rather than the future
• Can create defensive reactions and a critical state of mind in the receiver – feedback can be felt as a personal attack.

 

2. The Result often does not match Our Intention:

While you may have the best of intentions, the Receiver of the feedback may not be able to “hear” your message – even when it is delivered well.

Remember back to the last time you offered feedback and it was taken the wrong way or misunderstood?

When that happens reach into your toolbox and pull out EMPATHY.

At that moment, it doesn't matter if we agree or disagree or even understand what just happened – emotions are in play – and you know when Emotions are Up … Intelligence goes Down. Now is not the time to try to explain. Now is the time to Apologize.

Apologize. Sometimes misunderstandings happen. When they do, our first priority is to apologize. Even if we are certain we were crystal clear in our communication.

Your goal is to continue a healthy working relationship with the Team. Apologizing models exceptional leadership and builds a bridge to restoring our relationship and trust with the person or team.

 

 

Download the Balanced Feedback Worksheet here

 

Our BALANCED FEEDBACK FORMULA below … can help you overcome these two barriers to effective feedback

Imagine your feedback is Balanced like a “three legged stool”.

Each leg of the stool plays a critical part in keeping the feedback level and safe. What would happen if any one of the legs broke off? The stool tips over. The same thing happens in Balanced Feedback.

Each leg represents one KEY FACTOR in offering Balanced Feedback.

The 1^st Leg:

Remember: what you see and think, is your truth. It is not "THE" truth. We all have are our own views and opinions. This can be valuable; however it is never the entire picture.

When we acknowledge that our offering of feedback is only one piece of the whole picture, we begin to build a partnership with the person or the team.We begin to build trust.

It is human nature to be more open to listening to our partners we trust than someone 'telling us' what they think as if it were THE truth.

Create a Two-Way FEEDBACK DIALOGUE.

The trouble with 'our truth' is that we only incorporate the data and interpretations that we personally have access to. We did not see what happened right before or right after AND we certainly did not see it from any other person's perspective.

We can never possibly know all the circumstances, ideas, thoughts or intentions that were critical ingredients to the activity we are providing feedback on.

Effective Feedback opens up a Dialogue that includes other perspectives. You are open to seeing the same events from another viewpoint. You are more interested in improving the process using the whole team … than you are in being Right.

PRESUME INNOCENCE

Our human brain is wired to jump to conclusions.Our brains work SO fast! How often have you observed someone's less-than stellar behavior on a team - and had the immediate reaction/thought:

• “Wow, they're a real _______ ! ! "  (fill in the blank)
• Or, “They are deliberately 'sabotaging' the team!"
• Or, “It's clear they 'just don't want to be here!”

We promise you …

Nobody comes to work with the intention to do a mediocre job

Important Premise:

As a facilitator, it will serve you well to presume everyone is doing the best they can given the circumstances, their past wins and failures, their current emotional state and morale, and the training or tools made available to them.

Our job is to uncover Roadblocks - the circumstances that get in the way of each team member doing the best job they can - and work with the team to move the roadblocks out of the way.

We ask lots of QUESTIONS!

• Questions illuminate what the team sees and feels – their experience.

• Asking Questions assists the team in discovering the roadblocks they are experiencing – roadblocks that can often be easily remedied once revealed.

• Questions engage the team in a DIALOGUE. Dialogue – two-way conversation - is a critical pathway to building Trust. And when they Trust you, the Team will be open to your feedback.

• It has a script you can use to introduce Feedback as a Tool

• We give you four questions to help you organize your thoughts around what Feedback you are giving and Why

• It includes 16 different Feedback capturing questions 

• AND Finishes with a quick 9-Part Process to guarantee follow up

Peg and Shelley,